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Sober Dinner Dates! Top Tips and Benefits for a Sober Night Out…
Socialising sober is something that concerns virtually everyone when they think about taking a break from drinking alcohol, or stopping completely.
Around a third of people who come on my programs do so because they are causing serious damage to their most significant relationships as a result of their drinking. When these are partners, spouses, children, grand-children and close friends, it’s heart breaking for everyone. We’re not talking rock bottom here, we’re talking about regular drinking, and occasional drunken episodes. That is enough to disrupt trust and cause relationships to disintegrate. In this article, I explore 6 unexpected bonuses of spending romantic nights sober, and top tips for spending the evening sober.
Here are 6 unexpected bonuses of spending a romantic night sober.
- No Morning ‘Oh no!’ Moments
I can’t remember the number of times that I woke up the morning after only planning to have a couple of drinks and realise that I’d forgotten how many I had actually had. If you’re dating it might mean that that very average date somehow ended up on the pillow next to you the next day, and if you’re in a relationship it likely means that your other half had to suffer your personality changing alcohol-induced unpredictability.
- Making a Real Connection
When alcohol is your bestie, people around you feel second best. I learned during my sober journey how much more attentive I am to people around me now that I haven’t got 50% of my attention on how full my glass is, and when I can top it up without looking too obvious. Seriously, I didn’t realise how much attention went on the drink instead of the person opposite me. When you are the ‘real’ you, you are authentic and present for the person you are with. What greater gift to give someone than that of being completely present in the moment, just for them.
3. Confidence is Sexy
It’s something that shines through every movement and word. There is nothing better than going out and having a great time and arriving home to savour it without altering it with mind changing chemicals. Waking up in the morning feeling amazing adds a whole new dimension to the night out confidence too!
4. Bright-eyed and Awesome
Alcohol plays havoc with hormones, skin tone and every organ in our bodies, so no wonder we look so radiant after a couple of weeks of abstinence. We sleep better without alcohol in our systems disrupting our essential REM sleep as well. Bright eyed, and awesome every time!
5. Sober Sex
It’s a fact that alcohol increases the desire, but obliterates the performance! Sober sex is a connection between two human beings that is as natural as a raindrop on a spring leaf. Add a bit of spice and make it a night you’ll both remember!
Top Tips for a Sober Valentine’s
If you are newly sober then it’s a good idea to follow these tips in the early days:
- Enjoy the process of getting ready to go out. Make the process special to you.
- Plan what you are going to drink. If you haven’t been to the venue before, or it’s a surprise then have a simple backup option, like a tonic water on ice, and if your first choice is more elaborate, then you won’t be thrown off course if it’s not an option. If you want a nice glass, ask for one. If you want ice and lemon, ask for it. Non alcoholic doesn’t mean a luke warm coke in a tumbler! Avoid non-alcoholic alcoholic drinks too because unless you are ready, this will confuse your subconscious mind and may lead you back to square one. You know the ones… zero alcohol wine or beer.
- Focus on the food, the ambience, and the company. You’ll be amazed at how much more present you feel, and how much you notice.
- When you get home plan to have a caffeine-free tea, or non-alcoholic drink if you will be staying up. Make sure you have want in the house, so you are confident.
- Wake up in the morning, bounce out of bed and punch the sky!
If you need help to take a break or quit drinking click HERE for details of my Discover Sober Program.