“Why Do I Lie When I Drink?”: Understanding Why Alcoholics Lie 

By Michaela Weaver

If you have developed an alcohol addiction, you may notice that you behave differently than usual. 

Problematic physical and behavioral changes, such as avoidance, defensiveness, and lying, are common indicators of alcoholism and alcohol use disorder. 

Lying to loved ones is a prevalent symptom of alcohol addiction and other substance use disorders. 

You may be aware of the lying, but you may be perplexed as to why you lie when you are drunk. 

People who deal with alcoholism may try to hide or cover up their sickness in a society that stigmatizes alcohol usage and addiction, among other reasons. 

Why Do I Lie When I’m Drunk

The question that many ask of themselves is “why do I lie when I drink”. For many alcoholics, lying is a defense strategy that helps them sustain their addiction, and lying is ultimately a hurdle to recovery.

Why Do People Who Suffer From Alcoholism Lie?

If you have issues with alcoholism, your lying may leave your loved ones and friends feeling befuddled, furious, and heartbroken. 

It makes no sense at all that someone would ruin their life, health, and relationships by getting drunk.

Understanding the logic of addiction or the cognitive process behind lying and alcohol consumption might help you understand why people who struggle with drinking also lie frequently. 

Why Do Alcoholics Lie

There are several reasons why people with alcohol use problems frequently lie, including:

  • Lying to Get Away With Their Issues

People who suffer from alcoholism may never have learned how to deal with life’s concerns and challenges. 

You may have found temporary relief in your drinking and may wonder why your friends or loved ones attempt to steer you away from something that benefits you when they inquire about your alcohol usage.

“I’m simply looking out for your best interests,” your loved ones or friends may say to you, and the voice, or logic, of addiction responds, “Then why are you trying to take away the one thing that helps me cope?” 

They will persuade you that drinking alcohol isn’t a suitable copying method for a loved one.

  • They’re Lying To Keep Their Addiction

People who have an alcohol use problem frequently use alcohol to numb physical, mental, or emotional suffering. 

As a result, you must deceive yourself into believing that you are not causing harm to others close to you. 

As a result, lying helps to maintain and extend addiction. It would exacerbate the anguish you seek to numb if you understood and accepted that your addiction was causing pain for others.

  • Lying To Create A Fictitious Reality

For someone who is addicted to alcohol, addiction and chemicals distort reality. Because facing the truth of the situation is sometimes too unpleasant, you may create a fantasy world where your drinking habits are not a problem. 

“I can stop drinking at any time,” you can believe, but in reality, you drink until you blackout every night.

  • Avoiding Confrontation By Lying

If people try to approach you about your drinking issue, they already expect you to lie or dismiss their request for a talk. 

The confrontation would uncover your alcoholism and prompt you to seek treatment. 

For someone suffering from an addiction, the stress of confrontation can be overpowering. 

Drinking is your go-to coping method, and drinking more would exacerbate any addiction discussion.

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Coping With the Dishonesty That Comes From An Alcoholic

It might be challenging to deal with the continual dishonesty that comes with alcoholism. They badly want to believe that you understand your needs for assistance, but they know deep down that you are just merely saying what they want to hear. 

Identifying the difference between your falsehoods and reality can leave them weary and discouraged emotionally. 

That is why it is critical to look after oneself during this period. As they should learn to help without enabling, asking for aid from others can bring much-needed support.

Having a strategy in place while dealing with you is integral to coping with them. They can address your falsehoods differently after they have realized that the only behavior they can change is their own. 

They can help you ask for help to recognize and change their enabling actions. But suppose it’s not you, but you have a loved one that is an alcoholic.

In that case, there are various ways to plan and respond correctly to dishonesty in addition to that comprehension and recognition:

  • Don’t Blame Yourself

Your loved one may blame you for her decisions. Please don’t fall for it. You can’t be held responsible for her choices. She is the only one who can stop drinking.

  • Don’t Take Anything Too Seriously

It’s natural to believe that if your addicted relative loved you, she would stop lying about her drinking. 

Unfortunately, it isn’t that simple, and it has nothing to do with you. Because addiction alters the brain, your loved one’s conduct may no longer be within her control. Her condition has made lying compulsive behavior.

  • Don’t Try To Keep The Issue Under Control

Naturally, family members will do everything they can to prevent their loved ones from drinking. Rescuing your loved one every time there is a problem makes it easier for her to turn to alcohol instead of seeking help.

  • Don’t Put Up With Bad Behavior

Physical and mental abuse and harsh or disparaging words can have a long-term harmful impact on emotional health. 

You have the option of not tolerating this type of behavior from a loved one. Making excuses for your loved one’s behavior while she is inebriated serves to reinforce the dishonesty you’re attempting to eradicate.

Finding A Way Out Of Alcoholism

People who deal with alcoholism may lie, but lying should not be used to avoid the real problem: active alcoholism. 

It is necessary to expose and investigate the underlying factors contributing to their addiction. Allowing lies to keep you or a loved one from seeking therapy and a route to recovery is a mistake.

When you lie to your loved one or one lie to you, don’t turn a blind eye but don’t be nasty or defensive either. 

Assist your loved ones in seeing the repercussions of their falsehoods or let them help you by creating a safe environment where you can tell you the truth. 

If you’re seeking help cutting back on or quitting drinking, online our expert coaching programs are here for you. 

The Alcohol Coach can help. We offer science-based, and inspiring coaching programs. You may also sign up for the free masterclass and have access to free resources that will aid you in your quest towards alcohol-free life!

Please note: Although we refer to ‘alcoholism’ and ‘recovery’ in our articles, this is because these terms are often used by others. 

The Alcohol Coach services come from a viewpoint of empowerment, mindset shift and high powered transformational change. Then this happens there are no lifelong labels, no counting days, and pure unbounded freedom and discovery!


Hi, I'm Michela

I’m a leader in the science of transformational freedom for women, and someone previously addicted to alcohol. I have walked the path. I understand your concerns and fears. Here you will find some of my thoughts and insights. Happy browsing!

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Michaela Weaver

Michaela is the world's leading authority for enabling highly successful women to embrace their true, alcohol-free, authentic selves in a world where alcohol is normalised for those who are successful.Her ground-breaking science-based methods using The Science of Transformational Freedom, result in the revelation of uncovering The Social Secret®, so that high achieving woman can joyfully live their lives free from alcohol – but also thrive in all aspects of their work and personal life without it.